Monday 6th February 2017, 8.35pm. Today is the day I give up binge drinking. How many times have I said this before you ask? Well a lot…but this time it has to work out.
To give you a bit of background – I’m 24 (25 in 4 weeks), live in South West England, have a decent professional job which pays well and as you may have guessed by now, like to go out and get drunk a little too often. By often I mean every weekend. If I was just getting a little merry I could deal with that. The problem is that I always get so intoxicated that I lose most of my memories which then brings on a huge wave of anxiety and depression the days following.
I’ve hurt myself and others during these stupid pointless drunken episodes. Where shall I start? Last year I broke my ankle when I fell over drunk which lead to me being in a cast for 6 weeks. I could deal with this as surprising as that sounds! And more shocking…that is nowhere near the worst thing that I’ve done. I find it hard to rank cringey moments but the next story is definitely up there. A few years ago I was at a WORK party drunk and decided to bitch to my director about one of my colleagues…I was then sick on the floor in-front of said director leading him to putting me in a taxi with other colleagues. I was unfortunately sick in the taxi so the driver rightly asked me to pay £50 to cover the cost of cleaning + missed hours of work. When I slurred repeatedly that I wasn’t going to pay the police had to get involved.Not the best impression you want to make at a work event…
I could go on for hours about all of the things that I’ve gotten up to that I regret. For now though I’ll stick to telling you why I’ve promised to give up binge drinking now. I was at a friend’s party on Saturday and called a friend some horrible names. This has probably damaged the friendship – I don’t even remember saying these things. I am a good person but I’m not a good person drunk. I’m sick of not being in control.
I therefore swear to not get drunk for at least 4 weeks. This may seem like a small and pathetic goal to many people, but to me this is huge. I hope that following this I will then be much more in control when I do drink and have a more positive relationship with alcohol. FYI: I’m not an alcoholic and don’t have an addiction to alcohol, I just need to reduce my drunkenness for many reasons including saving money, saving face and becoming happier and healthier.
Expect honesty from this blog. I’m going to share lots of past stories, how I’m dealing with alcohol abstinence, my exploration of new hobbies and hopefully the positive effects from withdrawing from the harmful substance.
If you’re going through a similar patch and feel like you need to make a change – let’s go on the sober train together!